is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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