You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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