He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
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