I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
