What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
