Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
