FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
