i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize