clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
