the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I think my moral compass just broke
Please don't give away my fajitas
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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