we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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