i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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