So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
