so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
