this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I did not marry a roomba.
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