You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
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