hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I have peed in a lot of sinks
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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