It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
nobody is as good of a wingman as me. i make whoever im with look like mark wahlberg during his underwear model phase
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize