Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize
