She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
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