the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
True college students do jello shots in the library
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
