Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
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