just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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