btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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