We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
His nipple licking is glorious
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