Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
