Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Randomize
