Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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