Where is the hickey?
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
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