she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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