She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize