what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
