watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
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