Whod you bang
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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