They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Life is so much better after having sex.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
