Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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