I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
how does that bad decision feel?
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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