FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Randomize
