I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
