Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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