So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Randomize
