it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
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