so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize