My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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