The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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