So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
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