I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Randomize