Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
