come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
