its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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