Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
