wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
The air taste purple.
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