Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Randomize
